How My Horses Are Teaching Me To Live In The Moment

"The past is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift-that's why it's called the present."
I just love that quote!  I love it because all of my life I've struggled with staying in the now.  I'm either obsessing about the decisions I made yesterday or worrying about what decisions I'll need to make tomorrow.  But what I've learned just in the past year is that horses ONLY live in the present moment, and so they can be my very best teachers for learning how to be in the now!

Horses evolved to live in the moment because being in the moment was crucial to their survival.  In Allan J. Hamilton's fascinating book "Zen Mind, Zen Horse" http://www.allanhamilton.com, he describes this ability for them to be so exquisitely in the moment as being influenced by several different factors.  One is that they are prey animals rather than predators.  Many traits which distinguish predators from prey influence the horse's ability to be in the moment, from the way they travel, to how they learn, to how they pursue their food.  Another is that because horses lack language, they essentially have no ego.  There is no "autobiographical self", or identity that exists outside what their body feels.  Lastly, their brains are structured differently than ours.  He makes an argument that horses, because they lack language which is controlled by the left side of the brain, are right brain dominant.   Many traits that are heavily influenced by the left brain are precisely the same ones which prevent us from being able to live in the moment.

I learn a lot about being in the moment by just watching how horses in pasture eat.  Horses graze on the grass that's there, moving slowly in order to conserve their energy for when they really need it.  Horses do not live in the past, wondering why this year's grass isn't the same as last year's grass....they just eat what's in front of them.  Horses also don't fret about the future, worrying about what they'll eat tomorrow....they just eat what's in front of them.  What fabulous teachers for this idea of being in the moment they are!
Over the course of time in this blog I look forward to exploring further the ideas behind predator/prey, left/right brain dominance, and the impact that the lack of language has on the horse's way of being.  So many interesting ideas to explore!!  Happy trails and I look forward to hearing your comments and thoughts about all of this!

A New Beginning

Hello everyone, and welcome to my new blog "Horse(wo)manship"!  I am so excited to tell you all what I've been working on for the past year and to hear your comments and feedback.  Your first question is probably "What the heck is Horse(wo)manship"?!?  Well, I'll start with a little story.

My dad taught me how to ride...young!

In May of 2014, I participated for the second year in a clinic with a well known horseman who I respect immensely.  While I am devoted to and inspired by his work, I felt after my second year  a sense that something was missing.  I talked with several women after the clinic who felt frustrated and dejected as well.  It wasn't that the clinician was mean or even that we didn't learn a lot of useful skills-he is a kind, gifted horseman who is also a master teacher.  The content of the clinic was spot on.  We loved the clinic....we loved the clinician...but it was like, 'Oh boy, where do we go from here?!?'  It felt like we all needed a 'clinic after the clinic', a place where we could talk about our feelings and all that we processed during our work with the horses.

At the clinic on my horse C2

For me, it was clear that traditional horsemanship, while good for the horse, can be very hard on the horseman.....especially if that horseman happens to be a woman!  Women inherently come to the table (aka, the barn) with a unique set of histories, stories, hopes, and dreams.  So many of us are drawn to horses because of how a horse or story of a horse impacted us a child....or, we are drawn to horses because of the mystical possibilities that horses represent.  While the research is limited, there are several theories of why women are so drawn to horses...some plausible, some fairly bizarre!  http://www.horsecollaborative.com/women-love-horses/#

In my experience, horses represent so much more for us than just a tool for ranch work, athletic outlet, or way to express our wealth or social status.  Horses embody our hopes, dreams and fears.  They are big and have minds of their own.  They love us unconditionally.  They look to us for care.  And in all that, we feel an immense sense of responsibility to be the best with them that we can be.

What I felt after the clinic, and witnessed among several other women there, was this sense of distress and even of depression that we were standing on the edge of a precipice....that we had been given this immense responsibility to be advocates for our horses, but that most of the time we all feel fairly ill-equipped to be able to even advocate for ourselves.  As a horse trainer/riding instructor for the past 25 years, www.ridgemarkfarm.com I have often noticed this as well-that the physical aspects of riding are not what my students struggle with the most.  Oftentimes our lessons lead into long, heartfelt discussions about how their lessons make them feel about themselves.  I started becoming intrigued by the prospect of using the horses to help my students get to know themselves....for their lessons to become a platform for greater self awareness.  And so, the seed for "Horse(wo)manship" was planted!!

The girls and I at a lesson

My intention for Horse(wo)manship is:

1. To explore the ways in which by deepening our relationship to horses, we can deepen our relationship with ourselves
2. To learn how to become more 'horse-like'.  By exploring the ways of being that come so naturally to horses, and noticing how much we struggle with these things as humans, we can learn to amplify our own inner strengths, values, and energies
3. To further explore how to create a true partnership with both the horses and the humans in our lives
4. To chronicle my experiences with the horses that have graced my life, especially the serendipitous ones of the past year,  and to honor the blessings they've given me

I look forward to hearing your comments and exploring our relationship with the horses in our lives together!  Happy trails!!